I meet a ME-ME today. From across the playground, she introduced herself with squinted eyes - starring daggers at my little one and I as we entered the gate.
As I began to play and chase Princess P - she stood dangerously close, like she was trying to hear our conversation. It wasn't as if I was trading secrets of the DOJ with my toddler.
There was a simple chase, calling her name, and a tickle afterwards. But this lady would not stop following us. I think her spandex clad, stressed out hair-do self was more concerned about my daughter and I then her grandchildren. Although I am a natural people magnet (LOL) -- I just couldn't figure it out.
Then it happened. She asked, "is that really her name?". Why yes, plastic surgery needing grandma - it is on her shirt for God's sake.
And while she did not think I expected it, she asked the second question that everyone who always asks, "why would you name a child that?". This was a light version of question #2. Usually question two involves some kind of cuss word in it too.
These questions make me laugh. At first I want to cuss at her, Do you think I am embarrassed about my daughter's name? Do you think I care what you think about her name? No, not really. I named my daughter after a kind, motherly, active, smart, decisive, Godly, thankful, learning, giving, graceful, strong, patriotic, and passionate woman -- so no problems here.
So I politely smiled, nodded yes, followed with the explanation I just gave you all.
What was different this time was that before Me-Me could ask another condescending question,
I asked her, "What is your name?".
She replied, "Me-Me - spelled ME- ME."
Her smile reached the corners of her face - she was proud.
That was until I said, "ironic - pointing to my daughter- her middle name is Grace."
And with that HIS work was done. I held my head high - proud of my daughter's name- and went on to enjoy my day. Me-Me on the other hand, stood for a period of time speechless, shook her head, called for her man purse carrying son and left the playground with her two grandchildren in tow.
(((don't tell anyone but I think I won that one)))))
In 14 years of marriage Michael and I have lived in 5 different places -- all in the same town. I don't think we really meant on being nomads wandering within a 10 mile radius but it just seem to work out that way. Honestly, 14 years ago we had dreams of this..........with four kids, the dogs, and a life.
Moving into this present house, made that dream appear eons away.
This is really a great house. The neighbors are awesome. I am thankful. But it is not everything I envisioned for dwelling at this point in life. It is not bad by any means. It is just not us. I feel boxed in. I feel like the dream is outside of that box. ((sigh)).
But it is what it is - for now and a decision has been made to embrace what NOW is. Not saying there won't be a little struggle along the way, but I am determine to treat our time here not as a pit fall but rather a chance to grow.
After all, mastering a small garden will help us learn the ins and out of taking care of 20 acres. Decorating the dining room as a farmhouse banquet hall might allow some nights to feel as if we are dining under the stars. Taking care of neighbors so close will open the doors to appreciate them more when they might be so far.
So my little corner of subdivision, behind the stone wall, pie will be everything great I know it can be. Great training for what is yet to come.
Then it comes - the moment of encouragement.......
wait for it.....
it takes many different forms
"Wow, you must be tired."
"Wow, you must be busy."
"You know how that happens, right?"
"Do you know that lady on T.V. - the one with 19 kids, She is nuts too."
Or the best one yet....
"My mom had (insert #) kids, she was miserable."
Yup, that is my life just.about.every.day.
Should I let the strangers of encouragement know that I do 15 loads of laundry a week, keep my house from being condemned, write a blog, sew for clients, am teaching myself graphic design, training for a half marathon, serve in my church, serve in my community, help at the kids school, I read books, occasionally shower, love my husband, and find ministering to people very important? What would they say then?
Raising kids is difficult, raising four kids is impossible. My life is constant motion. You can not stop otherwise there is mutiny. I am tired. There are days I dream about running away. Then there are days where I just sit down and cry. It is not easy.
But I am a better person because I have four kids. I know what grace truely is. I find art in the everyday. My motivation kicks up a notch when I am around them. They drive me to be a better woman.
I love my children. One of the greatest joys is seeing them grow - a fruit of the labor indeed. And honestly, what if I had six, ten, twelve? Is it really there place to say?
I just pray that the pillars of encouragement who enter my life realize that woman (like me) need a pat on the back. Mothers we are superheroes. Why can't the public who crowds the ballfields to cheer on guys who hit balls for a living -- cheer on a woman who rarely sleeps and always sacrifices? What a concept.
Hello to a fast first year of marriage to My SIL and BIL - I love you guys! ((Did I mention a baby coming in about two weeks! Can not wait to meet my nephew))
Hello to looking like a baby at the wedding last year- WOW she has grown up fast!
Hello to last year's summer fun list. Slacker mom hasn't made one yet this year but I can say we are having fun! How about a last month of the summer list?
Hello! Loved the nature on the trip to the mountains, love to visit!
Hello to visiting the woman who taught me so much! She is amazing and I am thankful for her! I can count with a few fingers the number of people who love me completely unconditionally and she is the top one!
Hello to having my camper back!
Hello to beautiful memories from a 3/4 family trip!