Setting A Record Straight

Meaningful Monday - a sometimes crooked walk. 

I am blessed!  For the last 12 months, my family has been surrounded by a faithful community who has called, written, texted, and emailed encouragement almost on a daily basis.  The outpouring of love has been overwhelming and undeserving.   It is one strong backbone of what has carried Michael and I thru the last many months.  The last many months, we never hope to never experience again.  

But a few conversations in the last many weeks have burdened me to set a record straight. Some wonderful friends have commented on "how strong my faith is." Now don't get me wrong, I love my God - he is awesome. But I am not happy about this.  Nope, not one bit.  Not right now at least.  Who would WANT to see their husband think he is defeated?  Who would WANT to worry in the wee hours of the morning about what is going to happen next?  Who would WANT their faith in people destroyed?  Who would WANT upheave their kids?  Really, I don't WANT any of it!  Do you know anyone I can give it to? Frankly -- I am sick of it.

But as ugly as it is, or can get, I know that God has a plan for my family and he is sticking to it.  So at this point I may be upset but I have two options.  I can either kick and scream and make it as miserable as I can. Or I can go with it, and ride it out, looking for the SONshine the whole time.  I choose the latter for now.  

                                                                 Source: brabournefarm.blogspot.com via Pamela on Pinterest

That is where the faith lands my friends.  I don't have faith in the perfect house.  I don't have faith that all people will treat my family the right way.  I don't have faith in my husband's new job.  I don't have faith in those things, because they are temporary. I have faith that I have a father who knows best -- even when I don't agree with him.  

So, the cover of my book may be very pretty to look at but the story underneath resembles a bit of a tornado at the moment. That is just part of it, a chapter that is.   There will be chapters of sunshine and roses. But in the meantime, the ground needs to be tilled, mud thrown, and hard work put in for those roses to grow.  

                                                                  

                                                                   Source: everydaypeoplecartoons.com via Jennifer on Pinterest

For the Love of Neon

I do not do big decisions well.  Those usually involve some degree of change.  I like it, I love it- so just leave it the heck alone.  Or I might not even like it, but leave it the heck alone. Most days, I can't even decided what to get in my coffee.   Even when the writing is on the wall to move it like a money maker, I just sit on my money maker.  I ask God over and over again for neon printed in the sky.  You know, something like this....

Heather, follow me.  

I just continue to say that I just don't see it.  Like, right now. Michael and I have a giganto non-secure decision to make.  We need to follow a rope -- having no idea where it ends. We are paraylsized despite our faith. 

I write countless blog posts about this undying faith I have.  Not faith in myself but a faith in the Lord.  Yet, I flounder at best when it comes to show time.
  

                                                                                Source: thekitchn.com via Maxine on Pinterest

So if I am putting all my eggs with God, why for a golden minute would I think that he isn’t doing to same in me?